(Parody) Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson announces long-anticipated 2020 Presidential Run
[Disclaimer:
This article is a parody story. While some events in this article are actually
taking place, it is written for comedy purposes and shouldn’t be taken too
seriously.]
The Rock has entered the race.
Movie star and former WWE wrestler Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson is running in the 2020 Presidential Election as a Democrat.
“Originally I was gonna wait until 2024 before running for President, but I figured I can still make movies while running this country,” Johnson said to a crowd of fans before making his famous eyebrow lift.
Johnson’s agent stated that Johnson is also the most likable out of all the current Democrat candidates.
“Johnson has massive box office appeal,” the career acting agent said in front of a roaring crowd of “Fast and Furious” fans. “People on both sides of politics (liberals and conservatives) like him and the characters he portrays onscreen. His fan base is what’s gonna win him the nomination. That can’t be said for the 25 other Democrats in the race.”
Johnson made a name for himself as a movie star after retiring from the WWE. His notable films are “Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle,” “The Gameplan,” “Moana” and his role as Luke Hobbs in the “Fast and Furious” franchise.
According to Johnson’s campaign team, Johnson will travel across the country at political rallies, where he will promote the two dozen feature films he is currently filming in production.
“Basically every rally, town hall meeting, or interview is just The Rock talking about his latest movies, signing autographs, taking pictures or showing off his muscles,” an intern in the Johnson For President Election Campaign said.
Not everyone on the left is happy Johnson is running. SJW feminists quickly condemned him, calling The Rock a “macho male” and claiming he is spreading “toxic” masculinity by making his many action and comedy films.
Even Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez got into the verbal attacks against Johnson.
“How sexist of Dwayne Johnson to run for President,” Ocasio-Cortez said in her latest tweet on Twitter. “Just another powerful man who thinks he controls our lives and our bodies.”
Johnson immediately went on the offensive against Ocasio-Cortez, calling out her sexism. “Wow. AOC says I can’t run for President because I’m a man. Sexist much?” Johnson tweeted.
Several democrats running against Johnson also condemned his candidacy, claiming that a guy who made his living in the business and entertainment industries couldn’t possibly be elected president of the United States.
When reminded that an outsider/entertainer won the 2016 Presidential Election (aka Donald Trump), Democrat Sen. Elizabeth Warren went on an angry rant calling everyone who disagrees with her a “racist,” “sexist” or “bigot.”
At publishing time, Johnson announced that actor and comedian Kevin Hart will be his Vice President.
The Rock has entered the race.
Movie star and former WWE wrestler Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson is running in the 2020 Presidential Election as a Democrat.
“Originally I was gonna wait until 2024 before running for President, but I figured I can still make movies while running this country,” Johnson said to a crowd of fans before making his famous eyebrow lift.
Johnson’s agent stated that Johnson is also the most likable out of all the current Democrat candidates.
“Johnson has massive box office appeal,” the career acting agent said in front of a roaring crowd of “Fast and Furious” fans. “People on both sides of politics (liberals and conservatives) like him and the characters he portrays onscreen. His fan base is what’s gonna win him the nomination. That can’t be said for the 25 other Democrats in the race.”
Johnson made a name for himself as a movie star after retiring from the WWE. His notable films are “Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle,” “The Gameplan,” “Moana” and his role as Luke Hobbs in the “Fast and Furious” franchise.
According to Johnson’s campaign team, Johnson will travel across the country at political rallies, where he will promote the two dozen feature films he is currently filming in production.
“Basically every rally, town hall meeting, or interview is just The Rock talking about his latest movies, signing autographs, taking pictures or showing off his muscles,” an intern in the Johnson For President Election Campaign said.
Not everyone on the left is happy Johnson is running. SJW feminists quickly condemned him, calling The Rock a “macho male” and claiming he is spreading “toxic” masculinity by making his many action and comedy films.
Even Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez got into the verbal attacks against Johnson.
“How sexist of Dwayne Johnson to run for President,” Ocasio-Cortez said in her latest tweet on Twitter. “Just another powerful man who thinks he controls our lives and our bodies.”
Johnson immediately went on the offensive against Ocasio-Cortez, calling out her sexism. “Wow. AOC says I can’t run for President because I’m a man. Sexist much?” Johnson tweeted.
Several democrats running against Johnson also condemned his candidacy, claiming that a guy who made his living in the business and entertainment industries couldn’t possibly be elected president of the United States.
When reminded that an outsider/entertainer won the 2016 Presidential Election (aka Donald Trump), Democrat Sen. Elizabeth Warren went on an angry rant calling everyone who disagrees with her a “racist,” “sexist” or “bigot.”
At publishing time, Johnson announced that actor and comedian Kevin Hart will be his Vice President.
Comments
Post a Comment