(Parody) Washington Post under fire for calling Red Skull Hydra’s “Most Revered Military Leader”


[Disclaimer: This article is a parody story. While some events in this article are actually taking place, it is written for comedy purposes and shouldn’t be taken too seriously.] 


President Donald Trump ordered airstrikes that killed Hydra’s founder and leader, Red Skull.

Red Skull, who was in exile on the planet Vormir, was killed after getting off a spaceship at Baghdad International Airport to meet with other Hydra, Iraqi and Iranian military-terrorist leaders.

The airstrikes were carried out earlier today by U.S. Air Force Colonel James Rhodes (aka War Machine) and a joint strike team of U.S. Air Force fighter jets and rockets launched from U.S. Navy ships in the Middle East.

Red Skull was forbidden to travel outside Vormir after being forced to guard the Soul Stone. He was the military mastermind behind Hydra’s actions against the Allies in World War II and Hydra’s infiltration of S.H.I.E.L.D.

The Nazi-backed terrorist organization was the world’s second leading  sponsor of terrorism against the United States and the West, just behind Iran.

“Hydra was responsible for terrorist attacks that killed Americans in WWII and in present-day Washington,” Trump told reporters after returning from celebrating New Year’s Eve at Mar-A-Lago. “Attacks on Americans is where I draw the line. Hydra learned that the hard way.”

The Washington Post quickly condemned Trump’s order to kill the commander of Hydra’s terrorist network, calling Red Skull a “most revered military leader” of Hydra.

“Today, the world loses the most revered military leader of Hydra,” The Washington Post reported.

Republicans and the Avengers quickly condemned The Washington Post, pointing out numerous times the left-leaning newspaper was biased against superheroes, President Trump, conservatives and Trump supporters.

The Washington Post is a corrupt news organization,” Steve Rogers (aka Captain America) said. “They praise terrorists and madmen over hard-working ordinary Americans and our troops.”

At publishing time, CNN host Chris Cuomo accused Captain America of being a “Nazi.”

“It’s obvious from Captain America’s response that he is a Nazi and a white supremacist,” Cuomo said.

Cuomo then leaned in and whispered “Hail, Hydra,” to his fellow CNN hosts.



Comments

Popular posts from this blog

The Best Christmas Pageant Ever (2024) Review

Movie Review: The 5th Wave as Anti-Military propaganda

Local Kansas City parish hosts annual Marian Conference