Nicholas Servi

[Disclaimer: This article is a parody story. While some events in this article are actually taking place, it is written for comedy purposes and shouldn’t be taken too seriously.]  With 2019 underway, it seems like everyday there’s a new Democrat running for president. It’s important to keep track of them. Here’s a list of 2020 Democrat candidates, along with their pros and cons. Sen. Elizabeth Warren Pro: She’d be the first Native American president. Con: She pretended to be Native American so she could get a job at an elitist Ivy League college. She also was condemned by the Cherokee Nation.  Kathleen Kennedy Pro: Woman in authority. Con: Ruined Star Wars for all real Star Wars fans. The Duffer Brothers Pro: Created Stranger Things . Con: Facing a plagiarism lawsuit for stealing the idea for Strangers Things .  Mayor Pete Buttigieg  Pro: Replaced Beto O’Rourke as the left-wing media darling.  Con: No ...

[Disclaimer: This article is a parody story. While some events in this article are actually taking place, it is written for comedy purposes and shouldn’t be taken too seriously.]  Once again it’s LeBron James versus Golden State.  Warner Brothers announced that the Golden State Warriors are the antagonists in the new “Space Jam 2” film, starring LeBron James.  Early pictures from the production set show Steph Curry, Kevin Durant and the rest of the Warriors playing basketball against cardboard cutouts of famous Looney Toons characters, acting as stand-ins for CGI versions of Bugs Bunny, Daffy Duck and Tweety Bird. “We’re proud to have this opportunity to beat LeBron not just in basketball, but on the big screen as well,” Warriors Head Coach Steve Kerr said at a press conference following his team’s Game 2 victory against the Portland Trail Blazers in the 2019 Western Conference Finals. The film is believed to center around James’ quest to find ...

[Disclaimer: This article is a parody story. While some events in this article are actually taking place, it is written for comedy purposes and shouldn’t be taken too seriously.]  The Rock has entered the race. Movie star and former WWE wrestler Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson is running in the 2020 Presidential Election as a Democrat. “Originally I was gonna wait until 2024 before running for President, but I figured I can still make movies while running this country,” Johnson said to a crowd of fans before making his famous eyebrow lift.   Johnson’s agent stated that Johnson is also the most likable out of all the current Democrat candidates.  “Johnson has massive box office appeal,” the career acting agent said in front of a roaring crowd of “Fast and Furious” fans. “People on both sides of politics (liberals and conservatives) like him and the characters he portrays onscreen. His fan base is what’s gonna win him the nomination. That can’t be s...